How many times have you heard at a wedding from the bride or groom, “I married my best friend”? Or have at least heard this phrase thrown about? If you’re in a relationship and this isn’t the case, you might be questioning if your partner is the one since they aren’t your best friend. If so, don’t panic. You’re actually in the majority.
A Colorado University study on friendship found that only 14% of people considered their romantic partner as their best friend. The research team looked at the data drawn from a national survey on friendship in 2022. The participants they analyzed were 940 people in romantic relationships, aged 18 to 85, from a wide array of backgrounds that had said in their survey that they had at least one person they considered their best friend.
In the survey, each participant was asked to list up to seven people they considered friends, without being told whether to include romantic partners. Each person they named could be assigned multiple labels such as “close friend,” “romantic partner,” “best friend,” and others. Other data that was collected included the participants’ routine interactions with each person they listed along with well-being outcomes such as loneliness, social support, and stress.
Out of the group, around 36% included their romantic partner in their friend list. Within that sample, 39.5% gave their partner the “best friend” label, translating it to 14.4% of the total group. The rest of the people in the survey either didn’t list their partner at all or didn’t give them the “best friend” label. On top of that, there were some participants who did label their romantic partner as their best friend who also named other people as their best friend, too. So if you’re concerned about having your old college roommate, your lifelong pal from high school, or Alan from work as your best friend and not your spouse, it’s a not a true sign of trouble.
@faganchelsea God bless his bffs because i will not be watching formula 1 with him
“It is not technically the main focus of the study, but I did think it was interesting that some people (about 25% of the sample) labeled more than one person their best friend,” said Natalie Pennington, the study’s author, to PsyPost. “Sometimes socially I think there is this feeling of ‘I can only have one best friend’ and so I liked seeing that people didn’t always adhere to that.”
The results of this study can show that we don’t have to put our romantic relationships at the highest, isolated pedestal and that it probably isn’t very healthy if you do. Being in a married or committed relationship also doesn’t address the growing loneliness epidemic in the United States, which is considered a public health risk.
There are some benefits to solitude, but many mental health experts, including Arthur Brooks, an expert on happiness and professor at Harvard University, believe that having a mix of different friendships is key to feeling happy and balanced. This includes utility friendships (think your work buddy or the cashier you always chat with at the grocery store), pleasure-based friendships (the guy you invite to the party because he always makes you laugh, or the woman who likes true crime podcasts like you do), and “perfect” friendships (the friendships that grow from the first two into a relationship in which both persons are invested in the well-being of the other).
If your partner is your best friend, that’s not necessarily a bad thing at all though. However, regardless of your relationship status, if you’re not feeling fulfilled and are feeling lonely, it might be worth your time to look for other connections. There’s likely someone looking for someone like you as you are searching for someone like them.
An elderly man walks down an icy roadCanva 
An elderly man grilling at a partyCanva
Two people enjoying a walk through the woods
A woman pets her dogCanva 
A woman stands in front of a window listening to musicCanva
A group of people sit around a circle talkingCanva
A woman sleeping in bedCanva
Woman proudly displays an "I Voted" stickerCanva
A woman's ear with multiple piercingsCanva
A woman takes a bit out of a huge strawberry cakeCanva
The back of a woman's head with silver hair. Canva
A woman watches the sunset from her carCanva
A nurse holds a clipboard in a hospital hallwayCanva
A heavily-tattooed woman holds a mug of coffeeCanva
Stressed out man at workCanva
Stressed employee takes a break from workCanva
Overhead shot of three employees sharing a deskCanva
A pile of cashCanva
A pregnant woman clutches her bellyCanva
An eviction noticeCanva
Supportive Reddit comment Reddit | 
A gavel rests in front of a judgeCanva
Victoria Claflin Woodhull, the first woman to run for president of the United States in 1872rce Harvard Art Museum/Fogg Museum, Historical Photographs and Special Visual Collections Department, Fine Arts Library via 
Suffragists matching for women's right to vote in the early 20th centuryCanva
Amazon fulfillment centerCanva
A worker transports a heavy boxCanva
Female shopper looking for help
21 products that are gaslighting us into thinking they’re essential when they’re not
Some things in life are actually necessary—clean water, decent healthcare, basic human decency. But then there are the things that feel like they’re gaslighting us. The things we’re told we can’t live without, even though we survived just fine before they existed. Things like "smart" fridges, lawn fertilizer services, and yes—whole body deodorant.
Recently, our sister-site Upworthy asked their Facebook audience the question: What's a product or service that feels like it's gaslighting all of us into thinking it's necessary? More than 8,000 responses poured in. The answers were passionate, funny, and surprisingly unified.
Here are 21 products, services, and systems people called out for pretending to be essential—when they might actually be optional, overpriced, or flat-out invented.
1. Whole body deodorant
"Take a shower," said Shannon H.
“How did we ever manage all those years without it!! 😂😵💫” added Karen R.
Others noted it may help people with medical conditions—but for the average person, it's definitely a marketing creation.
2. Health insurance
It topped the list. Erica L. explained: “My doctor prescribes, the pharmacist issues meds, nurses care for people, surgeons do surgery—Health Insurance stands between health care and patients and says no, exclusively on whether they think it’s financially effective to treat you.”
Important note: Health insurance can provide life-saving access for many—but what people are frustrated by here is the profit-first system, not care itself.
3. The wedding industry
Multiple people slammed the high cost of modern weddings.
JoElla B. put it plainly: “We spend too much time and money planning one day, and not enough thought on how to blend two lives in a mutually beneficial one.”
Others called out expensive dresses, venues, and pressure to perform for social media.
4. Bottled water
Carole D. said: “Water in plastic bottles! Get a cup!”
While bottled water has value in emergencies, it’s often just filtered tap water—sold for profit in plastic.
5. Baby product overload
“Most baby products,” wrote Kelli O. “They really aren’t as needy and complicated as companies want us to think.”
6. Fabric softener
“It’s bad for clothes, bad for the Earth, bad for the wallet, and totally unnecessary,” said Gail H.
Some experts agree—many softeners contain chemicals that can reduce fabric lifespan and irritate skin.
7. Smart appliances
“Adding ‘phone controls’ to every appliance instead of making them last as long as they used to,” wrote Sherry S.
When your fridge needs a software update, something’s gone off the rails.
8. Makeup and anti-aging products
“Anything anti-aging,” said Melissa T., “Please just let me age into the gargoyle I was meant to become.”
Others questioned products designed to “fix” eyelashes, eyebrows, pores, and graying hair.
April S. added, “Products that women are convinced they MUST have in order to be ‘beautiful’ and therefore ‘loved.’”
9. Cosmetic surgery
Ron P. called out the industry as a whole. And while body autonomy matters, many commenters questioned whether insecurities are being commodified and sold back to us.
10. Ticketmaster and “convenience fees”
“Let’s go back to waiting in line at a record store,” wrote Nicole C.
Zaida B. added: “Convenience fee for online purchases—then charging $10 more at the actual event.”
11. Engagement rings
James P. didn’t mince words: “Engagement rings.”
The diamond industry has long been criticized for manufactured scarcity and marketing-fueled necessity.
12. Lawn chemicals and services
“Plant native grasses and you don’t have the pests or need for constant watering,” wrote Jamie B.
Environmental groups have raised similar concerns over runoff and unnecessary pesticide use.
13. AI and generative tech
“This stuff squeezes the lifeblood and individuality out of the human experience,” said Teresa L.
Saskia D. and others echoed skepticism about its necessity, even as many of us are being pushed to use it.
14. Funeral services
Amy W. shared: “My parents both have already paid to have themselves cremated and are very adamant that they do not want anything big done for them. In their words, ‘I won’t care, I’m dead.’”
Of course, some families find comfort in tradition—but the cost and pressure can feel overwhelming and predatory.
15. Rinse and repeat
Amy D. nailed it: “It’s just to sell more. Not even sure you need it at all.”
16. Credit Card Surcharges
Shawn S. took aim at the extra fees popping up at checkout: “That is the cost of doing business and shouldn’t be the burden of the purchaser.”
Many questioned why customers are increasingly being asked to pay extra simply for the convenience of using a card.
17. Constant phone upgrades
“Apple are notorious for releasing the same shit every year,” said Steph S.
Diana H. added, “Needing to upgrade our phones so frequently.”
Built-in obsolescence and marketing cycles drive most of the demand.
18. Vitamins and supplements
“If I took every supplement they say I NEED I wouldn’t need food. Nor could I afford it,” said Tausha L.
19. Fake pockets on women’s pants
Jessica W. said, “I have to buy men’s pants for work because women’s pants would just get torn up too fast!”
Form over function, and then they charge more for it.
20. Disposable everything
“The ‘convenience’ of disposable everything,” said Rick R.
It’s killing the planet—and draining wallets.
21. Tipping
“I’m sick of supplementing for corporations that refuse to pay a living wage,” wrote Susan V.
Tipping culture has evolved into something far removed from its original intent, and for many, it now feels like a burden shifted onto the customer.
The bigger picture
People aren’t saying all these things should vanish tomorrow. But when we start seeing convenience sold as necessity, and insecurity turned into billion-dollar markets, it's worth asking: who benefits from all of this?
And more importantly—who pays?
This article originally appeared earlier this year.